Rudimentary: Part 00 of the Drummer's Almanac

I put my sticks to skins this weekend with one thing in mind. To see if I still have it.

Have what? you ask.

Technique.

I haven't played acoustic drums with anyone in a long time and I feel like I may have lost my touch. Touch as in being able to play smoothly and delicately and aggressively. I want all of these tools in my box so I can pull them out at any given situation and fit right in. I want to know that I can slam like I used to and then ease back in the groove.

I started playing some rudiments just to feel it out; break off the rust. I was pretty smooth for not practicing. I went from a full tom roll assault to a nice buzz roll accenting with my crashes and splash cymbals. It felt good. I felt in control.

I reflected on this on Sunday as we were at church. The sermon was about identity and confidence in what Christ has instilled in us. This made me relate to my drumming technique.

I have practiced and played and have become good. I can fit into a lot of musical situations and I have a lot of tools at my disposal. I am confident that I can play well.

This has not been the case spiritually. I have a lot of tools at my disposal and yet I lack the confidence to use them. I don't think I can handle situations that may arise where I need to minister or support someone. I have also forgotten the tools that are in the box.

I am not trusting God to give me what I need, although, I have experienced his provision.

I reflected and knew that I needed to lift this up and get rid of these thoughts. I am spiritually sound. I don't have it all together, but I know that He is my deliverer. I can be confident in Him. I also know that I need to be putting myself out there and using those tools He has given me. I know through practice I will gain confidence in my abilities.

Healing For The Next Battle

Ready for the fight? .....yeah....
I feel like my walk with God has been more of an uphill struggle with little footing. My legs are getting numb. A lot of the reason is that I don't believe in myself. My confidence is shorter than my stride. I've been continuously fighting myself because I let myself believe that I'm not good enough.

I'm getting tired of the fight!

I know God has shown me more than I can grasp, but I forget or lose faith. I let myself slip back to the same old places and let go of the new ground I just took. I don't plant my flag and raise the banner. I do keep striving and that has kept me in the game.

I've been here too many times and I know that I have let it happen. It makes me think I love to feel this way. I like to feel miserable and sorry for myself.

The good news is that I have heard from others that they see a leader in me. It's not that I need affirmation from them to make myself feel better, but I needed to hear someone elses perspective to know that it's there. God used them to let me hear it.

It helped me heal for the next battle.

"Take your flunky and dangle!"

"...dangle!" What a great visual. Think about what that word implies and then put it in the context of an insult. Not an easy thing maybe, but it is interesting.

Our good friend Shawna came over yesterday and hung out with my family. We made it our movie night this week instead of the usual Sunday. This time we had a good time listening and dancing (well, Caden and I were, anyway) to Sade and other goodies on my iTunes.

Then we put the boys to bed and settled in the living room and watched one of the best mob movies out there. Not many people remember it, but it has some of the best dialogue ever!!! It was made by the Cohen brothers who brought us Raising Arizona, Fargo, Hudsucker Proxy, and O' Brother Where Art Thou. It is none other than Miller's Crossing.



The dialogue is definately original and catchy and the plot is deep with a twist. I don't know what it is about mob movies that just suck me in and hook me to the end. This one has everybody in it, too. Gabriel Byrne, Albert Finney, John Turturro, Steve Buscemi, and even a cameo from Sam Raimi.

The Cohen brothers have an eclectic body of work and, on occasion, tie their movies together with locations such as businesses or apartment complexes like the Barton Arms which is in Miller's Crossing and Barton Fink. Hudsucker Industries is where H.I. works in Raising Arizona and where Hudsucker Proxy is based. There are probably more ties than I have discovered, but they keep me coming back.

This is definately a reccomendation for my friends to watch this movie. I think you will enjoy. We did.